There were 3 of us. Me being half doctor, half programmer, all mad scientist. Another who is space engineer person, with a taste for women of blue hair and assassination profession. Then, there is Tamloo. He is of teacher in real life, as we are told. And as American friend once tell me "those who cannot do teach". Better words have only been spoken by Comrade Putin, friends. For Tamloo does not do.
We started Factorio game like any other game. We find things that need to be done so we can do more things. Except Tamloo. Tamloo does not see things to do. He sees something more, something we do not. As myself and space engineer man exchange productivity and insults, as manly men do when engaging in industry, Tamloo dreams. And when Tamloo dreams, our resources disappear like vodka on cold night in Russia.
Then, myself and space engineer friend look to each other and wonder of what madness Tamloo is possessed by. He builds these massive factories. But these factories, no comrade, they are not of thought. They produce much of what is not needed, like those mall places in America do. Myself and space engineer then spend time building massive processing facilities to strip millions of resources to feed the monstrosity that is Tamloo factory.
What is strange comrades is that we somehow find ourselves slowly progressing. Half of factory is either not producing, lacking of power, or being eaten by insect creatures. But does Tamloo care? No. He keeps building. And then we make great wall around factory, like president of America. And around great wall is thousands of turrets. No invaders can get in, or so we like to think. But once again we hear alarm of buildings being destroyed. We then see Tamloo outside of wall building more factory, as if generous space in wall was not enough.
By this time space engineer and myself, after many exchange of сyкa 6лядь, have managed to clean up production of red and green science. But can two men celebrate great acheivement of cleaning up accident bigger than Chernobyl? No. No comrades. We do not. We move on, to go clean up the next 3 science production lines, keep producing more power, and going to invade alien territory near where Tamloo is. For if Tamloo dies, thousands of valuable resources he should not have die with him. Tamloo does not carry firearm. And it is of like watching Europe happen when he goes near alien base building. He does not see, he does not listen. And he gets swarmed like grocery store in Venezuela. Again and again. We see message "Tamloo has died" and worry how many thousands more processing units and robots have been died with him.
We know base is shut down again until Tamloo finishes making more of resources he lost, rather than finding his corpse. So myself and space engineer friend go and look for body. We go in tanks with uranium bullets and hundreds of combat robots each. For when Tamloo dies, it is like horde of horny 'immigrants' around primary schoolgirl. We mow them down and lose more robots than Stalin killed people, but eventually we recover corpse of Tamloo. Thank the developers that tanks have inventory, as we need 2 tanks to carry what we picked up of Tamloo.
Speaking of developers, of what miracles did they make this game? We have giant Tamloo factory, and my computer, which is as old as MiG-29, still runs like Russian boar when drunk man is standing on back. And my computer is host of game too. Now to be fair when Tamloo is holding flamethrower, I know tenement will not need radiator anymore, since computer becomes radiator. But still is not as bas as Star Citizen, which when playing computer makes entire Russia become summer. KGB has asked not to play anymore, because people think Global Warming is real.
Now if you are still reading, I thank you for listening to my story. If you are still wondering if game is good, wonder no more. It is more than good, and you don't need crazy teacher friend to enjoy. It can be enjoyed single player, and there are many puzzle maps for those who like games such as Portal and The Witness. But multiplayer is where it is at. And with seemless integration of mods thanks to great thinking of developers, game which may seem to become boring gets new, and another 50 hours of life go missing.