6 январь 2017
I wonder what John Carmack would say if he knew we were calling him "based." I wish we could all go to his house and hoist him up on a sofa like a king and chant "Based Carmack!" while he smiled smugly like, "What can I do? They want to celebrate me, I can't stop them. Mm." Then at night the atmosphere would shift from a celebratory revel to a something more serious and subdued as the joints come out and we urge Carmack to partake and after a little cajoling he finally does and says, "I haven't done this in a long time." And somebody would say, "It's a good a time to start back up as any," and Carmack would nod and then cough and try to say "True that" through the coughing. "C'mon John, you can't take those big '90s hits anymore, you're an old man, and plus this shiеt is more powerful!" Then we'd ask him if he's feeling it yet, and he'd say "Oh yeah, you guys weren't kidding, this is powerful stuff, not like when I was young mm." And we'd start asking him what he meant in this tweet, what he was trying to say when he said that, and so on, and he'd smile and shake his head and say, "It was so long ago, and now you've got me high, I can't remember, I'm sorry!" OK, OK, then, we'd say, we'll give you a break. Sorry. We know you're high. Maybe when you come down a bit. Then somebody would shout, "Carmack did 9/11!" and people would get annoyed and shout at him to shut up and somebody would say, "Who is that? Who brought that аssholе?" And when it got late, and we began to feel like we were overstaying our welcome, I would corner Carmack and say, "Hey, listen, I feel like I'm having a panic attack, or something, and I can't go outdoors, something's wrong with me. Is it cool if I crash here? I won't tell anybody." And he'd say Fine, fine (still high as hell), and I'd say, "Thank you, based Carmack," and as I lay awake in the guest room in the dark I would try to think of really smart and insightful questions to ask him over breakfast, which I would have ready for him when he awoke.